When Desire Meets Expectation

The only reason you want anything is because you believe in the having of it, you will feel better.

When you desire something you think you can't have, it doesn't feel good.

When you desire something you believe you can have, even if you don't know how it will get here, or when.... it feels wonderful.  If you believe it is inevitable, the thought of that thing you want is uplifting, life-giving, exciting.  You don't have to have the thing you want in front of you in order to feel the exhilaration of having it because the act of visualizing it, thinking about how it feels to have it, feels sublime.  And feeling good is the reason you wanted it in the first place.

When you achieve the thrill of having something you do not yet have, but you believe it is yours, that desire becomes Expectation.  And then it becomes inevitably yours.

You cannot Expect something and not receive it.  If you truly expect it, and you don't doubt it, nor do you need it in order to feel good, it will show up.

However, the word Expectation is tricky.  The word implies something that will happen in the future. 

I remember getting myself caught up in the expectation of seeing mule deer on my hikes.  (This is related to an earlier blog).  I had a strong desire to see them, and I had 'expectation' but I had three things preventing it from happening.

1. I thought seeing deer would make me feel better.  I didn't feel bad, but I believed seeing the deer would verify my ability to manifest what I wanted.  (I needed to see them because it would justify my 'skill' and therefore my 'worthiness')  Plus, seeing deer would be thrilling.

2. I looked for deer, so my thoughts were primarily noting how they were not there.  As long as I was noticing the absence of them, I attracted more of the same.  Not only were they not here now, I had not seen any for years.

3. I believed I would see them, meaning it WILL happen (in some future time, because it's not right now)  That is "expectation" laced with "not right now," which means it will always happen at some future time, not now.

The way to get rid of the "not right now" is to make peace with what is.

I decided to stop looking for deer.  It began to not feel good to "fail" at the task of achieving that strong desire.  By the way, it was a strong desire because I had always been thrilled at close encounters with wild animals, and because I had added the element of testing my worthiness to it. 

I decided to enjoy the hikes for other reasons, and to lose the bogus thought of earning my worthiness through my accomplishments.

The very night I made that realization was the night I saw a mule deer on a sitcom on TV.  Suddenly I had a real, resistance-free expectation of seeing them.  Because I had let go of the need to see them, I suddenly saw one (on TV).

The next day not only did I see mule deer, they were there to interact with me.  They stood within 20 feet of me, looking intently at me and my dog for 10 minutes while I 'talked' to them with massive appreciation for them. 

Every day thereafter, no matter where I hiked, I had deer interacting with me. (like the hawks from a previous post).  Once you experience something, the expectation becomes even stronger.

One day while hiking I was talking out loud to myself about how wonderful it is to feel so good.  I was saying the skies are bluer, and trees are greener, people are funnier, I get to play with deer...  Just then I rounded a corner and was startled by three deer standing there.  They were so close I could see their eyelashes.  They had obviously heard me coming, because I had been making a racket!  They stood there waiting for me.  After I arrived, I 'talked' to them in my mind for a long time.  After a while, one of them made a gesture with her head that looked like an invitation to my dog.  He took her up on it and the chase was on!  At first I was concerned about my dog scaring them, but immediately realized how much fun it seemed to be for all of them.  They knew he couldn't catch them, and he didn't care.

One day I saw a pair of does 50 feet way.  They stood still and looked at me.  I continued to walk toward them for 10 feet.  One of them took a step to retreat.  I immediately stopped, and she stopped.  She then started to walk toward me for another 10 feet, stopped and looked at me while I talked to her.  She and her friend stood relaxed for many minutes.  They eventually decided to boing away, with my dog chasing after them.  As soon as the dog tired from the chase, they stopped to look at us some more.

Another day I was imagining a happy conversation with some mountain-bikers about deer.  I asked them if they ever saw them and they said no.  I said to them that "I have to practically push them out of the way." In my mind I imagined gesturing with my arm to push them aside.  At that moment a deer came running toward me and when he came within a few feet, abruptly turned left, as if I had to sweep him to the side.  (sounds silly, but it really cracked me up!)

Another day I came upon two bucks wrestling with their antlers.  They stopped sparring to look at me.  For a long time.

Another day I was thinking about a manifestation I wanted that hadn't appeared yet.  I had an epiphany; "Oh, It's just like Looking for Deer!" (being aware of the absence of something)
At that very moment, a deer jumped out of nowhere onto the trail in front of me.  She stood there while I 'talked' to her silently . She stood sideways, so I could see that after every time I 'spoke,' she wiggled her tail!  After she left, I thought, "We'll see her again later on the trail."  Ten minutes later, there she was, waiting on the trail.

Prior to seeing any deer, I had had very strong desire, but lots of resistant thought.  Once I dropped the resistant thoughts, by making peace with 'what is', Law of Attraction showed me a deer on TV and my expectation became real; not limited by thoughts of 'future' or 'worthiness' or 'absence,'